It’s official. I’m unemployed.

 

 

Breakups

I’ve had to break up with the following people/places in the past few weeks:

• Healthworks
• My breast surgeon
• My stylist (pending)
• My gyno
• My social worker
• My job (pending)
• Multiple people in my office(s) who are on vacation this week
•  All my friends 

How I’m Feeling

I’m having some anxiety. I drank no coffee yesterday and that seemed to alleviate it. You’d think that I’d skip it this morning and of course I didn’t. I really am starting to feel the excitement/anxiety of leaving. Changing everything that I’ve become accustomed to is uncomfortable, despite the fact that I know that I will adjust perfectly fine once I’m in NY.

I’m getting my spurts of being sad. When I’m packing I try to do as much as possible to get rid of the anxiety. However, I do come across some things that make me sad.  As I’m throwing things out/donating them, I’m feel more and more refreshed like I’m really moving forward and not holding onto things of the past. I’ve even come across some things from my last relationship that I had no idea was still in my apartment. That too is extremely cathartic (being able to throw that out and realize how far I’ve moved on from it.) 

Going away stuff (Surprise Party!!!)

A week ago Friday I was TOTALLY surprised b a Going Away Karaoke bash! I’m usually really good at picking up on things and I must admit that for this event, I had NO IDEA! It was so much fun and so many people showed up – fantastic! I was so touched that so many of my friends came out. Needless to say, I sang for a good portion of the night and got almost all my favorites in there. I think my favorites songs for the night were, ‘Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now’ (duh!), ‘Africa,’ and surprisingly ‘Run.’ I will post pics as soon as I can access them.

Here is an idea of what has been going on:

They got me a cake yesterday in Medford. It was VEEEEERY yummy!

We went to the Parish Cafe, which has REALLY good mac and cheese!

On Joey’s birthday, he accidently dropped my digital camera into the ball dispenser. HILARIOUS!

reflecting a little…

It’s Monday. It’s also the three week mark of when I will be leaving work. I realize that this week will probably be very busy, preparing for A-Step. Last night all I did was toss and turn. It was ridiculous. I don’t know why I was not able to just relax. I am pretty sleepy today, but I opted out of getting coffee this morning. I’d really like to try not drinking anything caffeinated in the mornings and work more on getting more sleep so I don’t feel like I need caffeine in the morning.

Things are coming together with regard to the move. I’m really, really excited about it. Our apartment is really awesome, and I’m insanely excited to move in and start fresh in a new city. It’s so weird to think that I’ve spent such a big portion of my life in Boston. It’s not only the time; it’s the fact that from 18 to 27 you change a LOT. So many things happen, people come in and out of your life, you learn a lot about yourself and you’re a completely different person than you were when you started out. I’m really looking forward to living in a new city (as in, actually LIVING IN that city, especially when it holds a place in my heart that no other city can.) I no longer will need to pack in seeing 20 people in one weekend when I’m in NY. Now I will be able to hang out with a different person every night! (Well, that’s if a. I have the time, and b. if I want to be going out/doing something every night.)

Here are some of the feelings I’m having:

Nervous about school and the workload.

Excited that I will be pursuing something that really interests me, and being able to do it during DAY hours when I’m most coherent.

Excited to be able to see my family whenever I want.

Moving in with Joey – yay! New steps in relationships are good!

Lucky that I have someone who wants to experience this part of my life with me (even when it means uprooting his.)

A little uncomfortable/melancholy/uncertain about what’s coming.

Change is always hard for me. I’ve grown very accustomed to my lifestyle in Boston that this will be a change and an adjustment. I’ve been wanting this next stage in my life to come along for the past 2.5 years so I definitely feel a greater sense of relief/excitement/relief that my life will not remain as stagnant as it has felt for the past few years.

Will I miss some Boston peeps? Of course I will – that goes without saying.

It’s more a matter of me having been ready to move on for SO long, so it can’t come soon enough. For a long time I had no endpoint to this portion in my life and therefore, there was no confirmation that an end was in fact coming.

Things that will always remind me of Boston/things that stick out in my mind about Boston:

Snow (duh!)
First taste of freedom
First roommate situation
Staying up all night freshman year and not giving a rat’s a** about anything except hanging out with people
The exact dorm I was in when we were attacked on 9/11/01.
Shows at the Palladium (where we were stranded and took a ride home from some kid’s mom, only she drove us to Natick and we had to then somehow find a cab to pick is up)
Bill’s Bar, the Middle East and Avalon (where I frequented most for shows)
The different music scenes I got into for so long
Saturdays were for shopping and going out at night
Cambridgeside Galleria Mall
Reflecting pool next to the Prudential
Bacco (North End restaurant)
The 3 guys I dated freshman year, and how each relationship seemed so serious and so long lived (the longest of any of them was 3 months)
Mike’s Hard Lemonade & parties/get togethers at Chris Zappala’s in Roxbury
Phoenix Landing (Boom Boom Room)
Common Ground
Lyndell’s Bakery
Soundbites
Thinking, esp as a freshman, that Cambridge was this far away land.
Spending some nights in my dorm room with only my roommate and having the best time ever
Graduating college
My first job out of college
Allston (in all its glory)
Bike rides along Stirrow Drive
What I thought was cool then vs. what I think is cool now
Coming home after my first quarter of school with a facial piercing
Tattoos started at 19
Some of the stupid decisions I made, and how I’m grateful to have made them in college and not now.

I’m sure this list will expand as I begin to pack and the countdown gets smaller.